In the last post I wrote that having a backyard wedding could be one way to save quite a bit of money but received a few comments that the idea of a having a wedding in someone’s backyard didn’t actually conjure up exciting images so I decided to do a blog post showing just how magical a backyard wedding can be.
Now that you and your fiancé have decided on your vision and the most important aspects of the wedding, the next step is the budget. A realistic budget that will allow you to choose most of the must-haves for your special day. In order to do this well you should know approximately what things cost in your area. You don’t want to spend time creating a budget only to discover that flowers cost twice as much as you had hoped to spend, so do the research. When you have info on most of the costs, you can look at the available funds and figure out what kind of wedding you are going to have. If needed and possible, ask your parents if they are willing to help in some way – whether by paying for some aspect of the wedding or just adding funds to the budget. Have a discussion with them and share your wish-list so that they know the scale of the wedding (and also so that they don’t try to pressure you into having the wedding of their dreams!) With open communication, parents can tell you how much they were planning to contribute. If you want their help financially you’ll get much better results when you invite parents to participate and allowing them to state what they’re comfortable with. Show them your priority list and share your excitement about the wedding planning process, rather than just telling them what your dream wedding is going to cost or trying to guilt-trip them into contributing more than they can afford. Never compare what they are contributing to what the in-laws are! If you initially told your parents that you are paying for the wedding yourself but after a period of time expenses have piled up and you now need help, just be direct and ask whether the offer of financial assistance is still on the table. Just FYI – couples typically spend between $20,000 and $33,000 but, it is possible to spend less than $10,000 and still have a fabulous wedding.
I have recently had inquiries about the difference between Chuppah’s Arches and Arbors so I thought it would be a good topic for a blog post as I am sure there are other couples asking the same questions.
The chuppah, like the one in the picture on the left is a tapestry attached to the tops of four poles. The word chuppah means covering or protection, and is intended as a roof or covering for the couple at their wedding. The “roof” consists of a cloth or sheet, sometimes a tallit which is a Jewish prayer shawl. The tallit could be stretched or supported over four poles, or manually held up by attendants to the ceremony. A chuppah symbolizes the home that the couple will build together. It is said that the couple’s ancestors are present at the chuppah ceremony.
What is your wedding or event style? When I first meet a couple I suggest that they close their eyes and envision what they want their wedding to look like as though it is the day of. To “look around” for details. I ask them to write down how they feel and how they “see” their surroundings and then we start a vision board using either Pinterest or an actual vision board or vision book. Once they find a venue we discuss how their vision compliments the venue, the challenges it may present and how we can overcome or modify their preferences.
If they envision a hotel or art gallery for the reception then the couple’s style probably leans more toward the elegant and/or modern. If they envision it in a barn, garden, beach or other outdoor space then they could lean more towards the rustic, country chic or casual style. As spring is here and summer is around the corner, I thought it would be a good time for a blog about outdoor weddings and event styles.